scottsterlingsfacefandomcom-20200214-history
No Work and All Cosplay/Transcript
;Since this sketch relies on impressions, they are noted in <>. Matt: Another bleak Saturday afternoon, spent in the solitudes of concessions. James: My dad said that if I got a date, he'd give me his car. Jason: My dad said he'd give me his respect. Then he and my mom cried. It was awkward. Matt: Come on, guys, we can't give up hope. Ah. Hope! James: Hope! Jason: Hope! Natalie: I know it came out forever ago, but some of those characters from Lord of the Rings are so hot. Tori: They're so hot! Can you imagine if one of them just like walked through the door right now? Matt: Please tell me we still have those costumes in the custodial closet? Jason: A true nerd is never more than 15 feet from cosplay. It's that way. Natalie: I mean, seriously, all a guy would have to do is put on a blonde wig, put on pointy ears, I would be all over it! Coming through, strutting on your lanes, I'm about to do my thing, watch me take a picture, flick-flicka! Watch me do my thing, I'm-a do my thing, watch me do my thing, I'm about to do my thing, I keep see moving and a-grooving, and I ain't gonna stop till you watch me do my thing, I'm about to do my thing, ay! Matt: Here, take it. Take the ring. I can't bear being single any longer. Tori: Um, I think our movie is starting, so we're gonna- Jason: You shall not pass! Tori: What is wrong with you? Jason: I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm trying to date you. Natalie: Oh. I guess that is weirdly flattering. James: Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys. Jason: Fly, you fools! Matt: Meat's back on the menu? James: That's the only orc I could think of! Matt: You could've said "Yeah, what about them? They're fresh!", ah, nevermind, that's worse. Mallory: Call me oldschool, but I still have a huge crush on those Hogwarts boys. Matt: Oh, we're about to be J.K. Rowling in honeys! James: No, guys! I can't do this! Jason: Relax, James! Hogwart boys! Nobody can misunderstand that! Mallory: Even Harry's scar was hot. Whitney: But Ron Weasley, though? Ugh! Pour me a drunk of that ginger ale! Mallory: Yes, right? Watch me do my thing, I'm-a do my thing, yeah, watch me do my thing, I'm about to do my thing, I keep see moving and a-grooving, and I ain't gonna stop till you spectators and haters join the show, yo, watch it! Jason: Hello, ladies. Matt: You two are the most beautiful, filthy Mudbloods I have ever seen. Mallory: Aren't you that awkward kid from my social studies class? Matt? Jason: How dare you speak the Dark Lord's name? Mallory: What do you creeps want? Matt: Go on a date with us. Or I will kill your parents. Whitney: You guys are seriously the weirdest people ever. James: Mhm. You must not tell lies! Or I will make you inscribe bloody messages on your hands for punishment! Whitney: Stop it! James: The Ministry shall hear of this! Matt: I don't remember having an Umbridge costume. James: Hmm-hmm-hmm! Jason: That's it! No more dressing up! Alena Helzer: Seriously, I freaking love Batman. Matt: No, Jason, you just said no more! James: And you mustn't tell lies, Jason! Jason: Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Batman! Matt: Batman! James: Batman! Kayla Yentes: Where are the employees? Jason: Well, hello, beautiful. Owww, owww. Ow, ow, ow. Matt: Holy loneliness, Batman! They left already? James: What? They left? Well, now I just look ridiculous! I'm about to do my thing, hey! Category:Season 8